"In My Head" - Anna Nalick
I don't have a lot of time, but I wanted to jot this down before it leaves my head. I woke up early this morning with a heavy heart and hurried to my phone thinking that maybe I dreamt it all and a "Good Morning" text would be waiting for me. Ugh...but I texted anyway and received a sweet text in response. I know it makes it harder, but I needed the reassurance that I wasn't the sole reason for saying goodbye and then I went back to sleep.
An hour and a half later, I woke up again. This time with a headache. I had another infamous nightmare of him with a potential someone, this being the real reason for walking away. It hurt like hell. It still hurts. Why does my head do this to me?!
Nightmare:
I was wondering when I'd hear from him, but heard nothing yet again. He didn't have a ride home so naturally, I got worried. I checked to see if he was already home (home being a two-story house - I should've made the connection that I was in a dream, but nevertheless...). I walked up the staircase to one of the rooms. He came out with her. Strange that she had no name. Go figure... But she was tall, slender, with straight, brown hair and a pale complexion.
"Hey, where were you? I was gonna pick you up, but didn't hear back." - Me
She brushes passed me without a word.
"Oh, well I just asked ___ to pick me up." - Him
She starts to make her way half-way down the staircase.
"Why? I could have picked you up as always." - Me
"Well, I'd rather have her because I don't know...we have a lot more in common and ya know, we're kinda best friends now, I guess you could say..."(trails off, watching her as she goes down the steps).
"___ wtf is going on? Is there something going on here?" - Me
"I don't know...maybe (she said smiling, looking back up at him). - Her
"I knew it! How the hell could you do this to me?!" (slamming down on his chest until my fists became numb). - Me
And then I woke up with extreme pressure on my chest that I almost couldn't catch my breath. I'd usually tell him all this and get mad at him for my own crazy thoughts. He'd just laugh it off. Then it suddenly hit me: This was no longer my problem, my right, my him.
This song may or may not relate to this, but it was on my mind. The funny thing is it's called In My Head and that is exactly where all this heartbreaking bullshit came from. I hate my head. I hate it even more when it comes up with stuff like this. Now, I don't have anymore reassurance and I'm back down the mountain again trying to climb up...
Lyrics:
Under the weight of your wings
You are a god and whatever I want you to be
And I wonder if truly you are
Nearly as beautiful as I believe
In my head
Your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another lonely night
Under the weight of your wings
Should ever we meet on your side of your stereo
I will pretend I know not of your thoughts
And even the way that they mirror my own
I'll take you away in the way that you take me and go where I go
In my head
Your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another lonely night
Fall away to the sound of my heart to your beat
Melancholy and cool, kind of bitter sweet
Love on repeat
I'm echoing all your philosophies
And as I fall away to the sound of my heart to your beat
Melancholy and cool, kind of bitter sweet
Love on repeat
I'm echoing all your philosophies
And as I...
Oh...
I don't
Wanna be fool-hearted
Baby, I'm out
Numbered in my head
I don't
I don't wanna be fool-hearted
Baby, I'm out
Numbered in my head
My head...
In my head
Your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another night
Yeah, your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another lonely night
Lonely night...
Under the weight of your wings
I make believe you are all that I'll ever need
All that I need...
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/annanalick/inmyhead.html
http://clownflower.com/nalick.jpg
I don't have a lot of time, but I wanted to jot this down before it leaves my head. I woke up early this morning with a heavy heart and hurried to my phone thinking that maybe I dreamt it all and a "Good Morning" text would be waiting for me. Ugh...but I texted anyway and received a sweet text in response. I know it makes it harder, but I needed the reassurance that I wasn't the sole reason for saying goodbye and then I went back to sleep.
An hour and a half later, I woke up again. This time with a headache. I had another infamous nightmare of him with a potential someone, this being the real reason for walking away. It hurt like hell. It still hurts. Why does my head do this to me?!
Nightmare:
I was wondering when I'd hear from him, but heard nothing yet again. He didn't have a ride home so naturally, I got worried. I checked to see if he was already home (home being a two-story house - I should've made the connection that I was in a dream, but nevertheless...). I walked up the staircase to one of the rooms. He came out with her. Strange that she had no name. Go figure... But she was tall, slender, with straight, brown hair and a pale complexion.
"Hey, where were you? I was gonna pick you up, but didn't hear back." - Me
She brushes passed me without a word.
"Oh, well I just asked ___ to pick me up." - Him
She starts to make her way half-way down the staircase.
"Why? I could have picked you up as always." - Me
"Well, I'd rather have her because I don't know...we have a lot more in common and ya know, we're kinda best friends now, I guess you could say..."(trails off, watching her as she goes down the steps).
"___ wtf is going on? Is there something going on here?" - Me
"I don't know...maybe (she said smiling, looking back up at him). - Her
"I knew it! How the hell could you do this to me?!" (slamming down on his chest until my fists became numb). - Me
And then I woke up with extreme pressure on my chest that I almost couldn't catch my breath. I'd usually tell him all this and get mad at him for my own crazy thoughts. He'd just laugh it off. Then it suddenly hit me: This was no longer my problem, my right, my him.
This song may or may not relate to this, but it was on my mind. The funny thing is it's called In My Head and that is exactly where all this heartbreaking bullshit came from. I hate my head. I hate it even more when it comes up with stuff like this. Now, I don't have anymore reassurance and I'm back down the mountain again trying to climb up...
Lyrics:
Under the weight of your wings
You are a god and whatever I want you to be
And I wonder if truly you are
Nearly as beautiful as I believe
In my head
Your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another lonely night
Under the weight of your wings
Should ever we meet on your side of your stereo
I will pretend I know not of your thoughts
And even the way that they mirror my own
I'll take you away in the way that you take me and go where I go
In my head
Your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another lonely night
Fall away to the sound of my heart to your beat
Melancholy and cool, kind of bitter sweet
Love on repeat
I'm echoing all your philosophies
And as I fall away to the sound of my heart to your beat
Melancholy and cool, kind of bitter sweet
Love on repeat
I'm echoing all your philosophies
And as I...
Oh...
I don't
Wanna be fool-hearted
Baby, I'm out
Numbered in my head
I don't
I don't wanna be fool-hearted
Baby, I'm out
Numbered in my head
My head...
In my head
Your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another night
Yeah, your voice
You've got all that I need
And this make believe will get me through
Another lonely night
Lonely night...
Under the weight of your wings
I make believe you are all that I'll ever need
All that I need...
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/annanalick/inmyhead.html
http://clownflower.com/nalick.jpg
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