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Big, Ugly Monster

"Turning Tables" - Adele


Oh, Adele. How funny that I chose to put you on repeat all day without having any idea at first as to why I wanted to hear you so much. I guess my heart knew something was coming up that would make me need you.

Sigh, Adele. Why, huh? I'm trying to be thankful here. I'm trying to be happy here. I'm trying to be better for me, Adele. It's been long enough and it's ridiculously unfair that I'm the one spilling my soul onto this like it matters.

It's just words, Adele. And I'm telling you, I'm getting mighty sick of these sad words finding their way out of me so easily. It's driving me nuts! It's just too difficult to focus all my attention on this optimism business.

Man, Adele. This is not what I had in mind. Not after my birthday. Not after Europe. Not after a year.

No, Adele. Make it stop already. Make it go away. Have more great things happen to brighten up my day. Because this ain't it, Adele. Dammit, this definitely ain't it.

I don't know what came over me this afternoon. I was easily irritable, impatient, flustered and fed up, but the odd thing was I was calm on the outside. I didn't feel this building up inside of me at all, but suddenly there it was like a big, ugly monster that jumped out of the closet and screamed, "Boo!" And yet what did I do? I didn't cry. I didn't run. I cuddled with the damn thing for nearly 3-months hoping that it would quit messing with me. I cared for it as if looks could be deceiving and thought, "Hey, maybe this time it won't hurt me. Maybe this time it won't bite." I even bought it a present and now I'm staring at this neatly wrapped gift box, shaking my head at the mere thought that I even considered getting it anything at all...let alone having it wrapped.

Stupid, pretty box. I want to rip you open and dump you. You're not heavy and you didn't even cost me a pretty penny, but you were just something I saw and wanted to give to someone I thought would appreciate you. Sadly, they don't appreciate sh*t so there you are silly, square box. Staring up at me like you have some place better to be. But that dumb dope of a monster doesn't want you. It doesn't know what it wants. But I know now it'll know what it'll never get. I don't mean you, dear box. You'll go back to your original home sweet home soon enough and that monster? Oh,don't you worry. That monster will get even more of what it deserves. I wish I could say the same for me.

Lyrics:

Close enough to start a war
All that I have is on the floor
God only knows what we're fighting for
All that I say, you always say more

I can't keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb I can't breathe

So, I won't let you close enough to hurt me
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I can't give you what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables

Under haunted skies I see you
Where love is lost your ghost is found
I braved a hundred storms to leave you
As hard as you try, no, I will never be knocked down

I can't keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb I can't breathe

So, I won't let you close enough to hurt me,
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I can't give you what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables

Next time I'll be braver
I'll be my own savior
When the thunder calls for me
Next time I'll be braver
I'll be my own savior
Standing on my own two feet

I won't let you close enough to hurt me,
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I can't give you what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables
Turning tables, yeah
Turning, oh


http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/adele/turningtables.html
http://thefashpack.onsugar.com/date/2009/3/25
http://rephen.tumblr.com/page/2
http://www.jeffjonesillustration.com/stock-images/objects/822/present-gift-box/?page=3

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