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Malaya

"Kung Malaya Lang Ako (If Only I Were Free)" - Kris Lawrence



I don't know why, but I chose to put this song on repeat all day today. I guess it's been a while since a song popped into my mind right when I wake up and this morning this one did. It's been in my head ever since. Sadly, as fluent as I think I am in Tagalog, I have to admit I needed some help with this one. The word "malaya" threw me off. Funny how the word "free" was beyond my recognition. I just don't hear it said a lot. Maybe it's because I haven't been free or should I say felt free in so long...

What's even more interesting is how free I feel now in this new or should I say rekindled relationship. But not free in the sense that I want to continue seeing other people. Just free from stress. From trying to please someone who doesn't deserve it or knows how to make me feel worthy of it. From fixing everything except myself. From doing everything except for myself. I forgot how it felt to trust a man so strongly and have him have that same trust in me in return. It's kinda scary to think that this is still possible; that I may have found my match and this probably explains why I've been acting a bit hesitant to just jump right it in and go. I keep thinking, "Maybe I just don't know everything there is to know yet." But then I think, "Stop thinking!"

It all happened so fast that at times I need to sit down and take a breather so I don't fall over. Remember that sealed jar of mine where I lock in all those hard-to-keep, happy feelings? Well, it's been opened and I feel like I don't want to lose it again. Yet I also feel that if I keep chasing it to trap it I won't get a chance to enjoy the fact that it escaped for me to rediscover the excitement of it all over again too. So my pace changes. It speeds up and slows down. I can't tell if it's anxiety or euphoria. But out of nowhere, I'd be smiling and then sighing for no reason at all. I'm not naive to think that this will last forever, but will I be so stupid and not pretend just for a moment that it should? What if it could? Uh-oh, I'm at that stage. I'm out of practice here. This ones romantic. What do I do? I don't know if I could handle it, but it's better to wrap myself with his affection than be with someone who rarely pays attention.

Lyrics:

Nang ikaw ay dumating
(When you came here)
Nadama’y iba sa damdamin
(I felt something different in my heart)
Kilos mo’t mga paglalambing
(Your actions and caress)
Ang siyang lagi ay umaakit sa akin
(are the ones that allure me)

Kahit dayain pa
(Even when cheated)
Ang puso at isipa’y
(my heart and mind)
Hanap ka
(seeks for you)
Bakit nga ba ganyan
(Why is it like that?)

Kung malaya lang ako
(If only I were free)
Kung malaya lang ako
(If only I were free)
Ipagsisigawan kong mahal kita
(I will shout, "I love you!")
Kung malaya lang ako
(If only I were free)
Kung malaya lang ako
(If only I were free)
Ay ikaw ang tanging pipiliin ko
(you're truly the one I will choose)
Sana ay mahal mo rin ako
(I hope that you love me too)

Kung may isang pagkakataon
(If there was a chance)
Na ikaw ay makapiling ko
(that I can be with you)
Init ng aking pagmamahal
(the warmth of my love)
Ang siyang lagi ay ipadarama sa’yo
(shall be that I'll make you feel)

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080129201132AAt7eF0
http://videokeman.com/kris-lawrence/i-will-take-you-forever-duet-with-denise-laurel-kris-lawrence/
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