"Civilian" - Wye Oak
I purposely freaked myself out back into insomnia, but before you judge me let me explain. I know my creative writing skills are at its highest in the wee hours of the morning so in a desperate attempt to once again fill this beautiful blog with more than a titled post and a mere paragraph, I made every effort to stay awake. So, I did what I knew would work because it has worked every, single time. I used fear.
My imagination runs wild when I'm afraid. Often times this happens to me without trying, but lately with this thing called sleep I've been experiencing an even more unusual thing called peace of mind. This is supposed to be amazing, but it's so fulfilling that I haven't had one thought in my head that would spark up even the tiniest bit of interest in me to tell a story. Call me crazy but frankly, this just cannot be.
Unless you've been under a rock, you should know by now about AMC's television series The Walking Dead. Zombies. I have a thing for zombies. Right now it's all about the survival of the fittest in Season 2 so I figured it was safe to jump on the bandwagon. Of course I'd watch it when everyone's home and all the lights turned on, fully protected with a pillow in front of me and my feet curled up off the floor at all times, but this is not where the scare tactic comes in.
I've been handling myself quite well under pressure and thought that I was finally adjusting to watching "horror" all over again. So, I wanted this anxiety of mine to work in my favor. Enter scare tactic. It gets my adrenaline pumping at a radical rate that I can't sit still with my thoughts for too long. I have to have some way of releasing it; to let it spew out of me (no pun intended) so that I can make room for more. I need a filter system and I want this blog to be just that.
However, the episodes I've been watching just haven't been keeping me up. At this point in the game, the characters know what they are dealing with and these walkers have yet to find them hiding away in a farm. There wasn't enough of that eerie feeling of, "Glad I'm here and they're there" I get like when I watch Michael Jackson's Thriller music video, you know? So I decided to test my fear factor and take on the challenge of Season 1, episode 1: "Days Gone By."
Bottom line: It worked. A little too well. I got through 40 excruciating minutes. Now all I keep thinking about is walking barefoot through a haunted hospital hallway. Seeing metal double-doors spray painted with the words, "Don't open dead inside." Entering a pitch black fire escape with only a small pack of matches that would die less than seconds after it's been lit. Stacks upon stacks of wrapped up dead bodies. Boarded-up windows and turning antique door knobs. The slow-paced limp of a dead man's walk. The hollow eyes of a lost soul. The guts and gore of their victims smeared across their faces...
I guess you could say that this definitely made an impact on me and now I'm wide awake. I'm not exactly sure if it's in a good way yet, but I'll write to see if it too, will be revived from the dead.
Lyrics:
I am nothing without pretend
I know my faults
Can't live with them
I am nothing without a man
I know my thoughts
But I can't hide them
I still keep my baby teeth
In the bedside table with my jewelry
You still sleep in the bed with me,
My jewelry, and my baby teeth
I don't need another friend
When most of them
I can barely keep up with them
Perfectly able to hold my own hand,
But I still can't kiss my own neck
I wanted to give you everything
But I still stand in awe of superficial things
I wanted to love you like my mother's mother's mother did
Civilian, civilian.
http://www.azlyricdb.com/lyrics/Wye-Oak-Civilian-328337
http://www.liquidhip.com/2011/06/wye-oaks-civilian-is-more-than-wistful.html
http://blogs.amctv.com/the-walking-dead/2010/11/season-2-renewal.php
I purposely freaked myself out back into insomnia, but before you judge me let me explain. I know my creative writing skills are at its highest in the wee hours of the morning so in a desperate attempt to once again fill this beautiful blog with more than a titled post and a mere paragraph, I made every effort to stay awake. So, I did what I knew would work because it has worked every, single time. I used fear.
My imagination runs wild when I'm afraid. Often times this happens to me without trying, but lately with this thing called sleep I've been experiencing an even more unusual thing called peace of mind. This is supposed to be amazing, but it's so fulfilling that I haven't had one thought in my head that would spark up even the tiniest bit of interest in me to tell a story. Call me crazy but frankly, this just cannot be.
Unless you've been under a rock, you should know by now about AMC's television series The Walking Dead. Zombies. I have a thing for zombies. Right now it's all about the survival of the fittest in Season 2 so I figured it was safe to jump on the bandwagon. Of course I'd watch it when everyone's home and all the lights turned on, fully protected with a pillow in front of me and my feet curled up off the floor at all times, but this is not where the scare tactic comes in.
I've been handling myself quite well under pressure and thought that I was finally adjusting to watching "horror" all over again. So, I wanted this anxiety of mine to work in my favor. Enter scare tactic. It gets my adrenaline pumping at a radical rate that I can't sit still with my thoughts for too long. I have to have some way of releasing it; to let it spew out of me (no pun intended) so that I can make room for more. I need a filter system and I want this blog to be just that.
However, the episodes I've been watching just haven't been keeping me up. At this point in the game, the characters know what they are dealing with and these walkers have yet to find them hiding away in a farm. There wasn't enough of that eerie feeling of, "Glad I'm here and they're there" I get like when I watch Michael Jackson's Thriller music video, you know? So I decided to test my fear factor and take on the challenge of Season 1, episode 1: "Days Gone By."
Bottom line: It worked. A little too well. I got through 40 excruciating minutes. Now all I keep thinking about is walking barefoot through a haunted hospital hallway. Seeing metal double-doors spray painted with the words, "Don't open dead inside." Entering a pitch black fire escape with only a small pack of matches that would die less than seconds after it's been lit. Stacks upon stacks of wrapped up dead bodies. Boarded-up windows and turning antique door knobs. The slow-paced limp of a dead man's walk. The hollow eyes of a lost soul. The guts and gore of their victims smeared across their faces...
I guess you could say that this definitely made an impact on me and now I'm wide awake. I'm not exactly sure if it's in a good way yet, but I'll write to see if it too, will be revived from the dead. Lyrics:
I am nothing without pretend
I know my faults
Can't live with them
I am nothing without a man
I know my thoughts
But I can't hide them
I still keep my baby teethIn the bedside table with my jewelry
You still sleep in the bed with me,
My jewelry, and my baby teeth
I don't need another friend
When most of them
I can barely keep up with them
Perfectly able to hold my own hand,
But I still can't kiss my own neck
I wanted to give you everything
But I still stand in awe of superficial things
I wanted to love you like my mother's mother's mother did
Civilian, civilian.
http://www.azlyricdb.com/lyrics/Wye-Oak-Civilian-328337
http://www.liquidhip.com/2011/06/wye-oaks-civilian-is-more-than-wistful.html
http://blogs.amctv.com/the-walking-dead/2010/11/season-2-renewal.php
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