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Illusions

"Both Sides" - Joni Mitchell



I heard a snippet of this song forever ago and loved it instantly. It played on an episode of the Wonder Years and has carefully tucked itself away in my heart. I wanted to find it again, but I didn't know where to begin and yet every time I've blogged, the memory of it never inched its way forward to remind me. It came to me yesterday morning while in passing. It was playing softly in the background of too much sound and I asked around to get its name. Someone told me "California," but sadly they were wrong.

I couldn't sleep last night so I took my phone through my quiet home and sat patiently on the sofa until the sun came up. The whole room appears cold at first, sending off a fluorescent glow that bounces off from the mirrored wall's reflection against the beige paint that surrounds it. In minutes, the beam of the sunlight hits through the blinds and onto the wooden floor. Its reddish tone pierces through the subtle hues, stealing the blue away from its light. It creates an illusion of a warm space even if the early air carries with it a chill that it isn't quite ready to let go.

It was at this moment, a peaceful moment that rarely anyone has time to notice and appreciate, that I found the time to remember.

Lyrics:

Bows and flows of angel hair and ice cream castles in the air
and feather canyons everywhere, I've looked at clouds that way
But now they only block the sun, they rain and snow on everyone
So many things I would have done, but clouds got in my way

I've looked at clouds from both sides now
from up and down, and still somehow
it's cloud illusions I recall
I really don't know clouds at all

Moons and Junes and Ferris wheels, the dizzy dancing way you feel
as every fairy tale comes real; oh I've looked at love that way
But now it's just another show
You leave 'em laughing when you go
and if you care, don't let them know, no don't give yourself away

I've looked at love from both sides now
from give and take, and still somehow
it's love's illusions I recall
oh I really don't know love at all

Tears and fears and feeling proud, to say "I love you" right out loud
dreams and schemes and circus crowds, I've looked at life that way
But now old friends are acting strange, they shake their heads, they say
I've changed
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day

Oh I've looked at life from both sides now
from win and lose, and still somehow
it's life's illusions I recall
I really don't know life at all

http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/jonimitchell/bothsidesnow.html
http://www.fanpop.com/spots/joni-mitchell/images/23019117/title/joni-mitchell-photo
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