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Showing posts from August, 2011

What's So Good?

"Lights" - Ellie Goulding I'm on this Indie trip and I don't mind it at all. Actually, I prefer it. I landed on this website (http://www.indieshuffle.com/) some days ago and it's becoming an awesome addiction; a midnight snack when I need to fulfill myself with a satisfying sound that serves no other purpose, but to please me. I love getting lost in the music, listening to song after beautiful song, finding new artists, and reading about how others discovered them. Oh, how I envy these others. How I wish I could get an "in" to their Indie. "What's so good ," they ask? All of it. That's what. Lyrics: I had a way then losing it all on my own I had a heart then but the queen has been overthrown And I'm not sleeping now the dark is too hard to beat And I'm not keeping now the strength I need to push me You show the lights that stop me turn to stone You shine It when I'm alone And so I tell myself that I'll be strong And dr

Big, Ugly Monster

"Turning Tables" - Adele Oh, Adele. How funny that I chose to put you on repeat all day without having any idea at first as to why I wanted to hear you so much. I guess my heart knew something was coming up that would make me need you. Sigh, Adele. Why, huh? I'm trying to be thankful here. I'm trying to be happy here. I'm trying to be better for me, Adele. It's been long enough and it's ridiculously unfair that I'm the one spilling my soul onto this like it matters. It's just words, Adele. And I'm telling you, I'm getting mighty sick of these sad words finding their way out of me so easily. It's driving me nuts! It's just too difficult to focus all my attention on this optimism business. Man, Adele. This is not what I had in mind. Not after my birthday. Not after Europe. Not after a year. No, Adele. Make it stop already. Make it go away. Have more great things happen to brighten up my day. Because this ain't it, Adele. Dammit,

Lost Life

"Sleep" - Azure Ray I was in a foul mood this afternoon. Damn, the old me is wearing me out and she's only been back for about a day. I want to go back to Europe to drop her a$$ off. She needs to drench in sweat under Italy's treacherous summer sun. She needs to feel cramped inside a cold metal, 6-passenger train car. She needs to climb up several stairs to escape from the scary subways of Paris. She needs to turn crazy corners to avoid the havoc of the London riots... one that destroyed a 3-story warehouse filled with irreplaceable art by Indie singers, songwriters, and record labels that now have to rummage through charred rubble to start from scratch. But most of all, she needs to quit her b*tching as she slowly crawls around the curves of the deadly 110 freeway...especially as she passes a twisted black car with a heavy white sheet over the backseat... or what's left of it. Then maybe she would once again wake up and appreciate this little thing called life. I

Alter Ego

"Dancing in the Dark" - Tegan & Sara (Original by Bruce Springsteen) There's nothing like a set of twin sister lesbians to start my day right. At least that's how they were introduced to me by my co-worker as we sat inside a what-used-to-be-white PT Cruiser (it needs a car wash like no other). We were driving up Alvarado street passed MacArthur Park and Korea Town when this duo first came on. It was a bit soft at first, but I couldn't remember which song it was now that I think about it. I asked him who it was and he said their names so fast I thought he sneezed! It's funny how I discover things when I'm not looking. Anyway, he mentioned he loves covers and that these gals are known for doing pretty cool ones. However, since I'm not much of a fan of duplicates I was a little skeptical at first. I like originality, but lately I've been trying things on for size to see how well they fit. Going with the flow. Expanding my picky taste buds with

Done

"I'm Not Calling You A Liar" - Florence & the Machine I needed to unwind in the worst way today. The house was scorching and so was my temper. And it bothered me even more because it ruined this awesome high I've been on for the last couple of weeks. I pulled off my clothes and turned on the cold shower. This had to be diffused quickly. I wrapped my hair up and squeezed a good portion of Stress Relief onto my loofah, but the more I scrubbed the more irritated I got (and no, it wasn't from the scrubbing). Rather than trying to relax, all I managed to do was rethink all the reasons why I was so damn pissed. And the more I thought, the more the cold water got hot . I stepped out and dried off in a hurry, checking to see if the green light on my phone was blinking. Nope. Nothing. Bullsh*t. I pressed the towel against my face and screamed hoping it was thick enough to mute my rage. I stared at my flushed cheeks in the mirror and realized I needed to get my eyebrow

A Writer, A Dictator, & a Mad Love Letter

DUETTINO N. 21 "SULL'ARIA" From The Marriage of Figaro (Le Nozze di Figaro) Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart I woke up this morning with a beautiful ballad on my mind. Without a doubt, I knew that I would be here tonight trying to decipher its meaning. It's been years and yet I never really cared to look into this until now. Finally, I've come to realize what these two Italian ladies were "saying" to each other. All this time it was about a secret letter spoken by one and written by another. This was the Act that recounts "A Single Day of Madness." This is the lead-in scene right before the song would start in the Opera. Summary: The Countess dictates a love letter for Susanna to give to the Count, which suggests that he meet her that night, "under the pines". The letter instructs the Count to return the pin which fastens the letter. SCENA X (SCENE X) La Contessa e Susanna (The Countess and Susanna) Recitativo (Recitative) LA CONTESSA: (

Slowly Stop Spinning

"Blackbird" - Evan Rachel Wood It's 31 minutes to midnight in this warm night in August. The window is open, lights are dim with my fan set on "cool," yet the temperature still sits at 81-degrees Fahrenheit. 31-August-81. I find this amusing to say the least. I know I don't really know everything there is to know about you right now. I know that even if you do or did tell me everything , it's still not the same because I'm not you. However, for the first time since US, you reached out to me not because you felt you needed to...not out of pity or shame...not out of guilt or blame...and not because you wanted me to do this for you. I can't even if I wanted to. You reached out to reach out. This downward spiral you're on is spinning rather quickly, but take it as a reality check that you're tired of getting dizzy. Something had to happen for you to not only be aware of it, but to finally do something about it. Even if it wasn't you who

You Wouldn't Know by Looking at Me

"Breathe Again" - Toni Braxton There's this episode in Sex and the City that talks about things you do that you never want people to see you do. They refer to it as their "SSB," their Secret Single Behavior . It's the stuff that maybe you're embarrassed about or you never really thought to share with another person. Maybe you simply just prefer to do it in privacy for the sheer purpose of doing it alone. Maybe if you were in the presence of company, you'd mess it up entirely. Maybe having an audience makes you feel like it's just you acting stupid than the you that you feel when no one's looking. Whatever the reason, most if not all, people have at least one thing (plenty if you're interesting ) that would fall into this category. Me? Oh, I have quite a bit, but here's one for now. I like to lip-synch in front of a full length mirror while sitting on a computer chair and blogging about some of these songs. This is one of the songs.

A Piece of My Happy

"Someone to Love" - Jon B. feat. Babyface I want to continue this happy trend I'm on for as long as I'll let me. Happiness is... My niece. My "kids" (I miss ALL of them terribly). Feeling my hair against the middle of my back after waiting almost a year for it to grow out. Getting a discount at an already discounted price. Turning on the radio at just the right moment to hear just the right song come on at just the right time. Hearing the sound of the espresso machine making a delicious Caramel Machiato. A genuine "Thank You." A foot massage after a really rough day. The soothing sensation of Salonpas on my left shoulder. Craving spaghetti and coming home to it freshly made on the stove. Seeing cucumbers soaked in vinegar and pepper waiting for me in the fridge. Receiving a compliment on my blog. A beautiful outfit that makes me feel just as beautiful wearing it. An affordable, perfect pair of glorious shoes. A good movie. A productive day. A sati

A Lot of My Favorites

I'm sure I've done this before, but I'm not sure if I've done this here. I figured if it's something that I did do, but for the life of me can't remember when I did it...well I'll just do it again thinking I haven't done it yet. Obviously, I spend a lot of time thinking too much into things. It's who I am and it's quite impossible to change this overnight. I'm not going to stray too far from my own reality. Let's not be silly. However, with this attempt at trying to be a "New Me," wait...let me rephrase this: An "Improved Me," I am going to focus more of my attention on what makes me happy. So with that, I've decided to create a new blog about a few of my favorite things. Until then, let me start by listing them: Tori Amos and Betty Boop! Alright enough with the obvious, in no particular order here's more... Tabasco (not Tapatio!), spicy vinegar, Equal, Starbucks (not their house blended coffee although I lov

About Time

"Dust in the Wind" - Kansas Let me grab my barrings here for a minute. I'm not quite used to sitting still without a schedule in front of me, but I have to say HOME never felt so good. It's been a journey to say the least. I don't consider it a vacation at all. It was more like an adventure. For 10 days straight, I was up just before sunrise and down hours after it set. Day 1: Tues., 08/02 - All About Planes I faced my fear of flying with a couple of Dramamines and an iPod. Six hours from LA to NY with less than 30-minutes to jump on another plane for another nine hours to Rome. I thought this would be the hardest part of the whole trip, but surprisingly it wasn't. No anxiety attacks, tummy aches, or dizziness. I held myself together during both take-offs and landings. I was in Europe now. Time to overcome the old me. Day 2: Wed., 08/03 - Ciao Rome! I stepped off of the plane and into the most humid environment I've been in since the Philippines. I choked

Ten...ish

"Rocket Man" - Elton John Packed. Done. Feeling that uneasy feeling that I forgot something...or someone. So I stuffed a closet full of clothes into a single carry-on hoping that it would fill this emptiness, but all I got was a heavy piece of luggage. In a matter of a few hours, my next journey begins. I'm going to take this trip like I've yet to take life...one day at a time. There's no turning back now. Although we've mapped out where we're going, I'm not exactly sure where I'll end up once it's all over. And I'm ok with that. You can't always prepare for the unexpected and I've learned that sometimes the unexpected turns out to be the best part of the whole experience. So, I'll take my chances and let things fall where they may...even if there's a possibility it'll fall to pieces. With that I've decided to leave my heart behind on purpose. She can't tag along. Not for this. She's not quite ready yet and s